ciChange is a not-for-profit forum for ideas and discussion, about all aspects of Change Management, including people, processes, teams and leadership. It is a place to share and exchange models, papers, ideas and information about change. We welcome participation from a broad audience, including business and change leaders as well as project & change providers.
Saturday, 28 May 2011
Ladder of Inference: Finding meaning in what we say
The ladder of influence is a great model about how and why we make judgements based on what we see: This may be as simple as any boy who does ballet is strange, anyone who listens to radio4 is boring or provide justification for genocide!
The meanings of words come from the person, from within, based on experience, culture and context. The word pants has 2 different meanings: in the USA it means trousers, in the UK it means underwear.
Two people may have entirely different understandings, and put different value judgements on hearing that the defendant wore only pants and a T shirt!
If you can get a descriptive-word wrong, just imagine the scope for error with a judgement-word. Fred Bloggs is GREAT. Ask 10 people what being a great person means and you'll get 10 different answers.
How could this lead to genocide? Because people are lazy they seldom describe things in detail. Rather than say Fred Blogs is 5' 10" tall, blonde, blue eyes, speaks with an American accent someone may instead say Fred is handsome.
Because handsome is not the same for everyone, on hearing this everyone will use their interpretation of handsome and each have a completely different picture of Fred, which bears no resemblance to the facts.
Other problematic judgement-words include quality and expensive, since they are bound to have different meanings to different people.
What if the judgement-word was Evil, or Dangerous. What if due to experience, culture and context people put meanings into words which would result in fear, hate, panic. What if they acted on those feelings?
Unfortunately we all work with stereo-types, bias, pre-conceived ideas. Some are good - they protect us from dangers like fire, animals, drowning, accident - others restrict us, like phobias and bigotry. The only solution is to be factual in our dialogue and open to leaning from listening without bias.
Recommended link: http://server.vettweb.net.au/qho/qhlp/personalintegrity/documents/Theladderofinference.pdf
The magnificant 7 ways to influence, avoid or react
These are check-lists that I have developed from various sources, none is entirely original but I have found them useful and happy to share with others.
7 Ways to Influence
Do it…
7 Ways to avoid Influence
No, because...
How to react to negative feedback (possibly bullying)
7 Ways to Influence
Do it…
- Because you like me, and you’re like me
- Do it to reciprocate, repay past or future debt or promise
- Do it because everyone else is doing it
- This offer is good for a limited time only
- Do it to be consistent, with past, with values, with type
- You can believe me, I’m an authority
- Do it or else
7 Ways to avoid Influence
No, because...
- I like you, but I don’t like this proposal
- Is this a favour? Are you looking for something in return?
- Just because everyone else is doesn’t mean..
- If I don’t have time to think, I don’t have time to buy
- I need to think about what I want, and be consistent with that
- If I were you I might, but I’m not you
- Please explain the “or else” slowly so I fully understand
How to react to negative feedback (possibly bullying)
- Ask for time to think - it should force a pause or moment of silence.
- Think about what you want to happen - don’t fight back, think forward.
- Get the bully to stop yelling - “Please speak more slowly, I’d like to understand” or (if on the phone) say nothing until they ask “Are you still there?”
- What ever you do don’t explain - think forward, don’t justify, recriminate, excuse or offer explanation. They’re looking to exploit weaknesses (-) not strength (+)
- Ask “what would you like me to do?”. If so challenged they will ask you for something more acceptable than what they want. This is your exit opportunity.
- Don’t take criticism personally - attacks on your team, your work, your values, etc are not attacks on you. Although it is hard to resist “fight or flight”
- Learn from criticism - if you wait 24 hrs before answering criticism it will demonstrate maturity, reasonableness and you may learn something!
Thursday, 26 May 2011
Silly thinking on cause and effect
I have recently learned some new latin. It's always great to learn new stuff, now all I have to do it look carefully for an opportunity to insert this into a sentence!
The phrase cum hoc ergo propter hoc means that correlation between two variables does not automatically imply that one causes the other.
see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Correlation_does_not_imply_causation
I am an iconoclast and a follower of the "Church" of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
see http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/
Here is an example of cum hoc ergo propter hoc, from the above web-page.
You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.
I love this, it funny and clever. You'll know from other posts on my blog that I am interested in communication, influence and persuasion. The point here is that it doesn't have to be true to be believed only consistent. See the excellent book True Enough by Farhad Manjoo.
see http://www.crunchgear.com/2008/10/06/review-true-enough-by-farhad-manjoo/
I also like the (controversial) letter to the Kansas State Board because it also shows how parody can be persuasive.
The phrase cum hoc ergo propter hoc means that correlation between two variables does not automatically imply that one causes the other.
see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Correlation_does_not_imply_causation
I am an iconoclast and a follower of the "Church" of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
see http://www.venganza.org/about/open-letter/
Here is an example of cum hoc ergo propter hoc, from the above web-page.
You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.
I love this, it funny and clever. You'll know from other posts on my blog that I am interested in communication, influence and persuasion. The point here is that it doesn't have to be true to be believed only consistent. See the excellent book True Enough by Farhad Manjoo.
see http://www.crunchgear.com/2008/10/06/review-true-enough-by-farhad-manjoo/
I also like the (controversial) letter to the Kansas State Board because it also shows how parody can be persuasive.
Wednesday, 25 May 2011
Elevator Pitch and Sound Bites
I have been asked to prepare an elevator pitch (a 30second sales talk) about what I do, and given my interest in communications and relationships I immediately started thinking not about what I was going to say, but about what the person I was going to say it to, might hear and think.
Example:
I SAY… our business is the best, most successful and expert business for change and project management and that by being passionate and committed we have the energy and dynamism to make things happen.
YOU THINK…yeah, I’ve heard 100 companies say something similar. Enough about you, what about me?
Having taught for the Institute of Management I’ll often ask students if their firm has mission or vision statements. Most do. Then I’ll ask them to recite them. Most fail. Lots of firms will have value statements. My experience is that people are better at remembering these.
Having worked with the media, who will often edit what you say to convey the message they want others to hear, I’ve learned not to talk in long sentences, but in neat sound-bites. Short enough to be catchy and memorable. Vague enough to be universally acceptable. Not so long as to require thought or editing. Listen to 99% of politicians on the Radio4 Today Programme and they do the same. They never answer a direct question but instead insert the most appropriate of 20 sound-bites they have prepared for the interview!
So I have abandoned the idea of a ‘one-size-fits-all’ elevator pitch in favour of sound-bites which I can mix, match or juggle according to the audience, and which hopefully are both memorable and valuable since that is exactly how I want people to think of me - memorable and valuable!
These are a few (I never said they were going to be original!!)
I’m going to think of some more, but would be interested in your favourites and suggestions.
Example:
I SAY… our business is the best, most successful and expert business for change and project management and that by being passionate and committed we have the energy and dynamism to make things happen.
YOU THINK…yeah, I’ve heard 100 companies say something similar. Enough about you, what about me?
Having taught for the Institute of Management I’ll often ask students if their firm has mission or vision statements. Most do. Then I’ll ask them to recite them. Most fail. Lots of firms will have value statements. My experience is that people are better at remembering these.
Having worked with the media, who will often edit what you say to convey the message they want others to hear, I’ve learned not to talk in long sentences, but in neat sound-bites. Short enough to be catchy and memorable. Vague enough to be universally acceptable. Not so long as to require thought or editing. Listen to 99% of politicians on the Radio4 Today Programme and they do the same. They never answer a direct question but instead insert the most appropriate of 20 sound-bites they have prepared for the interview!
So I have abandoned the idea of a ‘one-size-fits-all’ elevator pitch in favour of sound-bites which I can mix, match or juggle according to the audience, and which hopefully are both memorable and valuable since that is exactly how I want people to think of me - memorable and valuable!
These are a few (I never said they were going to be original!!)
- We are about doing the right things and doing things right.
- Projects methodologies are like self-assembly furniture. Craftsmanship is altogether better.
- It you think a professional is expensive, try hiring an amateur.
- There is no point in being fast, if it is in the wrong direction.
- A grade B plan with grade A execution is better than a grade A plan with grade B execution.
- We put the passion into projects, dynamism into delivery, commitment into change and have the energy to make it happen.
- Project management is about partnership, change management is about communication both are about people.
I’m going to think of some more, but would be interested in your favourites and suggestions.
How do we define ourselves?
I have heard and seen couple of things in the last couple of days that were really simple but very effective. Whilst I am keen to blog lots of clever stuff that is hopefully interesting (feedback welcome) I'm really pleased to share simple stuff that I have found valuable.
INTERESTING SUBJECT 1
First, a friend is doing an Masters dissertation ostensibly on what influences boys to do boyish sports and girls to do girlish sports and it caused me to re-think and challenge what it means to be a boy or a girl in terms of attitude (as opposed to the physical differences).
Example1. Ballet and Gymnastics both require balance, strength, power. Is there a physical difference between the two, or is it just the social labels we put to them which might make them boyish or girlish?
Example2. Netball and Basketball look pretty similar. Is people's willingness to do one or the other based on the sport, social pressure, peer appraisal or label stereo-types.
I am really looking forward to seeing the output of this research.
INTERESTING SUBJECT 2
I've put these together because they are linked.
Another friend (a gym instructor) explained that when working with children she would literally get down to their level. If they sat on the floor she would too. If they rolled on the group she would too. She engaged them by been their equal (in height as well as language!)
This was really interesting because as adults we seldom take the effort to match the people with whom we have dialogue. Short sentences should get short replies. If one person is seated the other should be too. If one uses simple language the other should mirror this.
Now this may seem obvious (especially to a generation used to body language and NLP) but how often do we see someone standing and talking in long complex sentences to an audience seated and wanting something in plain English!
INTERESTING SUBJECT 3
I have another friend who is studying to be a psychotherapist (yes I have some pretty interesting and unusual friends!)
He spoke of how we project onto other people what we think, they think of us. We react not to what the person is saying or doing, but what we think, they think. This links to an earlier blog about words and meanings and how every communication is a mix of TOPIC and RELATIONSHIP eg what is being said, and how we feel we are being treated.
Example: You explain to me how to fix a gearbox. I think, you think I am an idiot and I respond not to what you said, or even to how you said it, but according to my internal notion about what I think you (and the rest of the world) thinks about me. If we take this on trust it suggest that we are self-limiters, we sabotage ourselves all the time!
A phrase I have often used when coaching summarises this: We all have a voice in our head which talks to us. Perhaps when we are about to do something difficult or important. If that voice was outside your head, or indeed those same words were spoken by someone else - would that person be your friend? Is the voice in your head your friend or your enemy?
The common theme here seems to be around how we behave as a result of what we think other people think of us. In Subject 1, boys might be boyish only to assert their membership of their social group, and make decisions according to the social labels, rather than any other factor. In Subject 2, children cannot relate to an adult doing adult things, but quickly embrace ideas if the teacher joins their social group by being child-like. In Subject 3 we see the importance of friendship and social acceptance to getting along with people, including getting along with ourselves!
I welcome feedback and suggestions to other reading, podcasts, blogs, etc.
INTERESTING SUBJECT 1
First, a friend is doing an Masters dissertation ostensibly on what influences boys to do boyish sports and girls to do girlish sports and it caused me to re-think and challenge what it means to be a boy or a girl in terms of attitude (as opposed to the physical differences).
Example1. Ballet and Gymnastics both require balance, strength, power. Is there a physical difference between the two, or is it just the social labels we put to them which might make them boyish or girlish?
Example2. Netball and Basketball look pretty similar. Is people's willingness to do one or the other based on the sport, social pressure, peer appraisal or label stereo-types.
I am really looking forward to seeing the output of this research.
INTERESTING SUBJECT 2
I've put these together because they are linked.
Another friend (a gym instructor) explained that when working with children she would literally get down to their level. If they sat on the floor she would too. If they rolled on the group she would too. She engaged them by been their equal (in height as well as language!)
This was really interesting because as adults we seldom take the effort to match the people with whom we have dialogue. Short sentences should get short replies. If one person is seated the other should be too. If one uses simple language the other should mirror this.
Now this may seem obvious (especially to a generation used to body language and NLP) but how often do we see someone standing and talking in long complex sentences to an audience seated and wanting something in plain English!
INTERESTING SUBJECT 3
I have another friend who is studying to be a psychotherapist (yes I have some pretty interesting and unusual friends!)
He spoke of how we project onto other people what we think, they think of us. We react not to what the person is saying or doing, but what we think, they think. This links to an earlier blog about words and meanings and how every communication is a mix of TOPIC and RELATIONSHIP eg what is being said, and how we feel we are being treated.
Example: You explain to me how to fix a gearbox. I think, you think I am an idiot and I respond not to what you said, or even to how you said it, but according to my internal notion about what I think you (and the rest of the world) thinks about me. If we take this on trust it suggest that we are self-limiters, we sabotage ourselves all the time!
A phrase I have often used when coaching summarises this: We all have a voice in our head which talks to us. Perhaps when we are about to do something difficult or important. If that voice was outside your head, or indeed those same words were spoken by someone else - would that person be your friend? Is the voice in your head your friend or your enemy?
The common theme here seems to be around how we behave as a result of what we think other people think of us. In Subject 1, boys might be boyish only to assert their membership of their social group, and make decisions according to the social labels, rather than any other factor. In Subject 2, children cannot relate to an adult doing adult things, but quickly embrace ideas if the teacher joins their social group by being child-like. In Subject 3 we see the importance of friendship and social acceptance to getting along with people, including getting along with ourselves!
I welcome feedback and suggestions to other reading, podcasts, blogs, etc.
Saturday, 21 May 2011
Pint-Size Project Documentation (Small PRINCE)
PINT-SIZE PROJECT DOCUMENTATION
I am a great fan of structure when managing my sport or my work: it allows me to make the best of by time and resources, and gives me the means and ends to measure and improve performance. It is therefore inevitable that I would be a sportsman (I enjoy Triathlon and Rowing) and a project manager (I am a PRINCE2 Project Manager with an MBA).
However too much paperwork and bureaucracy subtracts from the aim, and too little leaves people unclear about their role, goal and priorities and wastes resources. I good friend once used a farming analogy and said 'are you weighting the pig, or fattening the pig' because simply weighing it does not achieve the goal just as writing a training programme does not make you fit.
Additionally if you are writing truing plans (or project plans) for other people KISS (keep it simple SMART) is key to clear understanding. If it is clearly understood than success is more likely. Goals should be SMART - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Results-related, and Timed)
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keep_it_simple_stupid
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SMART_criteria
So here is my version of the 5 day course and 350 page PRINCE2 manual in a few lines...
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince2
DOCUMENT NO1 - PROJECT BRIEF (What are we going to do?)
PROJECT: Give the project a title that makes the goal clear
SUMMARY: Provide a summary of the goals, roles, budget and time-scale of the project. This can be done in a couple of sentences, which I often include in the top-line of every update report to ensure people stay on-track, by reminding them the target: on-time, on-budget, to-specification.
BENEFITS: Explain money and non-money benefits - why are are we doing this?
Get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Who are the key people involved? Well a representative of the person providing the money (Finance Dept?) a representative of the person providing the resources (Supplier Company?) a representative of the person receiving the project (End-User Dept?) a representative of the person overall in-charge (Executive/Sponsor?). Then communicate this to everyone involved.
DOCUMENT NO2 - BUSINESS CASE (Why are we going to do it?)
(1) BACKGROUND -
(2) PROPOSAL -
(3) BENEFITS -
(4) RISKS - Of going ahead: . Of not going ahead:
(5) COSTS -
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement.
Recommended link: http://www.betterprojects.net/2006/02/risk-and-assumptions.html
DOCUMENT NO3 - PROJECT INITIATION DOCUMENT (How will it be done?)
(1) PROJECT SCOPE - what is the goal, what is included and what is excluded
(2) DELIVERABLES - what items, documents, testing needs to be delivered
(3) WHO DOES WHAT - identified experts, accountabilities and stakeholders
(4) TASKS AND TIMESCALES - logical order of stages, tasks and milestones
(5) BUDGET - including capital/purchase costs, revenue/running costs and project/installation costs
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Then communicate this to everyone involved.
WEEKLY/MONTHLY UPDATE DOCUMENT (How are things progressing?)
(1) WHAT'S DONE (tasks done and things delivered since last report)
(2) ISSUES (note of any issues, risks, and what decisions have been, or need to be made by the 'key people')
(3) WHAT'S NEXT (next phase tasks, responsibility, budget, deliverables, dates)
(4) FORECAST (update on time, budget and quality, to confirm project still viable)
Circulate to all the key people, plus others as required. Keep communications going, it is vital.
CLOSURE / END OF PROJECT (How did it all go? What might be done differently?)
(1) WHAT WAS THE OUTCOME - Did the project achieve its aim on-time, on-budget, to-specification. Might be useful to compare to the original BREIF, and BUSINESS CASE as well as decisions made and recorded in the UPDATE DOCUMENTS. This provides a good audit trail for the project.
(2) ANYTHING OUTSTANDING - There may be some outstanding tasks, be clear about managing these.
(3) WHAT WENT WELL - Note and praise successes
(4) WHAT SHOULD BE DONE DIFFERENTLY - Note and acknowledge feedback and criticism which will help improvement.
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Then communicate this to everyone involved.
Some interesting links I have found
Recommended link: http://www.betterprojects.net/p/resources.html
I am a great fan of structure when managing my sport or my work: it allows me to make the best of by time and resources, and gives me the means and ends to measure and improve performance. It is therefore inevitable that I would be a sportsman (I enjoy Triathlon and Rowing) and a project manager (I am a PRINCE2 Project Manager with an MBA).
However too much paperwork and bureaucracy subtracts from the aim, and too little leaves people unclear about their role, goal and priorities and wastes resources. I good friend once used a farming analogy and said 'are you weighting the pig, or fattening the pig' because simply weighing it does not achieve the goal just as writing a training programme does not make you fit.
Additionally if you are writing truing plans (or project plans) for other people KISS (keep it simple SMART) is key to clear understanding. If it is clearly understood than success is more likely. Goals should be SMART - Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Results-related, and Timed)
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Keep_it_simple_stupid
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SMART_criteria
So here is my version of the 5 day course and 350 page PRINCE2 manual in a few lines...
Recommended link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince2
PROJECT: Give the project a title that makes the goal clear
SUMMARY: Provide a summary of the goals, roles, budget and time-scale of the project. This can be done in a couple of sentences, which I often include in the top-line of every update report to ensure people stay on-track, by reminding them the target: on-time, on-budget, to-specification.
BENEFITS: Explain money and non-money benefits - why are are we doing this?
Get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Who are the key people involved? Well a representative of the person providing the money (Finance Dept?) a representative of the person providing the resources (Supplier Company?) a representative of the person receiving the project (End-User Dept?) a representative of the person overall in-charge (Executive/Sponsor?). Then communicate this to everyone involved.
(1) BACKGROUND -
(2) PROPOSAL -
(3) BENEFITS -
(4) RISKS - Of going ahead: . Of not going ahead:
(5) COSTS -
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement.
Recommended link: http://www.betterprojects.net/2006/02/risk-and-assumptions.html
(1) PROJECT SCOPE - what is the goal, what is included and what is excluded
(2) DELIVERABLES - what items, documents, testing needs to be delivered
(3) WHO DOES WHAT - identified experts, accountabilities and stakeholders
(4) TASKS AND TIMESCALES - logical order of stages, tasks and milestones
(5) BUDGET - including capital/purchase costs, revenue/running costs and project/installation costs
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Then communicate this to everyone involved.
(1) WHAT'S DONE (tasks done and things delivered since last report)
(2) ISSUES (note of any issues, risks, and what decisions have been, or need to be made by the 'key people')
(3) WHAT'S NEXT (next phase tasks, responsibility, budget, deliverables, dates)
(4) FORECAST (update on time, budget and quality, to confirm project still viable)
Circulate to all the key people, plus others as required. Keep communications going, it is vital.
(1) WHAT WAS THE OUTCOME - Did the project achieve its aim on-time, on-budget, to-specification. Might be useful to compare to the original BREIF, and BUSINESS CASE as well as decisions made and recorded in the UPDATE DOCUMENTS. This provides a good audit trail for the project.
(2) ANYTHING OUTSTANDING - There may be some outstanding tasks, be clear about managing these.
(3) WHAT WENT WELL - Note and praise successes
(4) WHAT SHOULD BE DONE DIFFERENTLY - Note and acknowledge feedback and criticism which will help improvement.
As above, get the key people involved to sign-off their agreement. Then communicate this to everyone involved.
Some interesting links I have found
Recommended link: http://www.betterprojects.net/p/resources.html
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Ever felt like saying 'but that's not what I said'?
I've become really interested in communication. It is a tool we have all used since birth, even before language we have ways of communicating!
It seems simple, but is complex. It is the cause of knowledge and wars, of love and hate, and commonly of mis-understanding.
The problem seems to be due to the fact that my words, with my meaning, in my context, based on my experience, and my objectives to support me.. are not the same for you, your experience, your meanings etc.
Things are made worse because communication is about both TOPIC and RELATIONSHIP at the same time. Everything I say or do is personal, but the meaning that I give it when it is transmitted may not be the meaning that you put to it when it is received, because YOU are different from ME.
The process has been likened to tennis rally, with the conversation ball dependant upon both people being able to understand and react to each-other in a way that suits both. Attempting to serve an ace in such circumstances is destructive!
Since we were born communication serves 3 purposes..
1. What people say, do and act toward us, defines our self-image
2. We need to build both communications and relationships to survive
3. The use of communications allows us to influence our world
Our subconscious analysis all communications on 3 levels..
A. What's going on here?
B. What will happen next?
C. How am I being treated?
Given 1,2 & 3 and A,B & C there is a lot going on!
The theories suggest that when I talk I will be thinking of me, of my self-image and what you think of me. You will have your perspective for each of these areas. Where conversation supports each-others beliefs (about our selfs) then we have rapport. When it does not we rationalise, justify, or become defensive to 'save face' This is a subconscious and automatic reaction.
It requires us to take a conscious action, to breath deeply, to take a break, to reflect, in order to over-ride the auto response system and re-calibrate to take account of new learning, new perspectives.
The challenge is not about clear transmission. It is about what you need to do or say to ensure clear reception. Is this what Derren Brown does when he puts an idea into somebody's head, and then proceeds to 'mind read'?
I think it is a fascinating subject. If you do too, I recommend these links..
Link 1
Link 2
It seems simple, but is complex. It is the cause of knowledge and wars, of love and hate, and commonly of mis-understanding.
The problem seems to be due to the fact that my words, with my meaning, in my context, based on my experience, and my objectives to support me.. are not the same for you, your experience, your meanings etc.
Things are made worse because communication is about both TOPIC and RELATIONSHIP at the same time. Everything I say or do is personal, but the meaning that I give it when it is transmitted may not be the meaning that you put to it when it is received, because YOU are different from ME.
The process has been likened to tennis rally, with the conversation ball dependant upon both people being able to understand and react to each-other in a way that suits both. Attempting to serve an ace in such circumstances is destructive!
Since we were born communication serves 3 purposes..
1. What people say, do and act toward us, defines our self-image
2. We need to build both communications and relationships to survive
3. The use of communications allows us to influence our world
Our subconscious analysis all communications on 3 levels..
A. What's going on here?
B. What will happen next?
C. How am I being treated?
Given 1,2 & 3 and A,B & C there is a lot going on!
The theories suggest that when I talk I will be thinking of me, of my self-image and what you think of me. You will have your perspective for each of these areas. Where conversation supports each-others beliefs (about our selfs) then we have rapport. When it does not we rationalise, justify, or become defensive to 'save face' This is a subconscious and automatic reaction.
It requires us to take a conscious action, to breath deeply, to take a break, to reflect, in order to over-ride the auto response system and re-calibrate to take account of new learning, new perspectives.
The challenge is not about clear transmission. It is about what you need to do or say to ensure clear reception. Is this what Derren Brown does when he puts an idea into somebody's head, and then proceeds to 'mind read'?
I think it is a fascinating subject. If you do too, I recommend these links..
Link 1
Link 2
Change Management: 48 Laws of Power or Win Friends and Influence People
Change Management: 48 Laws of Power or Win Friends and Influence People
I have recently been recommended reading the 48 Laws of Power Click Here
There is some interesting stuff here..
# Law 1 Never outshine the master.
# Law 2 Never put too much trust in friends; learn how to use enemies.
# Law 3 Conceal your intentions.
# Law 4 Always say less than necessary.
# Law 5 So much depends on reputation. Guard it with your life.
# Law 6 Court attention at all costs.
# Law 7 Get others to do the work for you, but always take the credit.
Add 41 more..
The list is long so I'd recommend reading the book or clicking the link above
I'm not sure I agree with these, for example Law 7 seems wrong to me.
I loved the book How to Win Friends and Influence People. I read it 20 years ago, and should read it again because although the advice is simple mastering it has proved a challenge
Click Here
I prefer these since I believe legitimate and constructive power comes from relationships rather than command and control
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
1. Don't criticize, condemn, or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Six Ways to Make People Like You
1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person's interest.
6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say "You're Wrong."
3. If you're wrong, admit it quickly and empathically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Start with questions to which the other person will answer yes.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.
Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise every improvement.
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
I have recently been recommended reading the 48 Laws of Power Click Here
There is some interesting stuff here..
# Law 1 Never outshine the master.
# Law 2 Never put too much trust in friends; learn how to use enemies.
# Law 3 Conceal your intentions.
# Law 4 Always say less than necessary.
# Law 5 So much depends on reputation. Guard it with your life.
# Law 6 Court attention at all costs.
# Law 7 Get others to do the work for you, but always take the credit.
Add 41 more..
The list is long so I'd recommend reading the book or clicking the link above
I'm not sure I agree with these, for example Law 7 seems wrong to me.
I loved the book How to Win Friends and Influence People. I read it 20 years ago, and should read it again because although the advice is simple mastering it has proved a challenge
Click Here
I prefer these since I believe legitimate and constructive power comes from relationships rather than command and control
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
1. Don't criticize, condemn, or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.
Six Ways to Make People Like You
1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person's interest.
6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.
Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say "You're Wrong."
3. If you're wrong, admit it quickly and empathically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Start with questions to which the other person will answer yes.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.
Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise every improvement.
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Wednesday, 18 May 2011
Climbing the pyramid for better relationships
Climbing the pyramid for better relationships
There appear to be lots of pyramids in management speak. One that you may be familiar with is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, which suggests we need the basics to survive, but over time seek to climb and aspire to greater things eventually attaining self-fulfilment.
Whilst this concentrates on the individual, it is interesting to see a similar approach for personal relationships. In the example below leading to marriage.
So what about the work-place? Many spend as many hours in the work-place as we they do with their partner. What can we learn from the above to apply to building business relationships?
A model that I like suggests the steps as follows..
Acknowledgement
Understanding
Acceptance
Respect
Trust
Bond
It took ages to find words that neatly form a pyramid!
There appear to be lots of pyramids in management speak. One that you may be familiar with is Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, which suggests we need the basics to survive, but over time seek to climb and aspire to greater things eventually attaining self-fulfilment.
Whilst this concentrates on the individual, it is interesting to see a similar approach for personal relationships. In the example below leading to marriage.
So what about the work-place? Many spend as many hours in the work-place as we they do with their partner. What can we learn from the above to apply to building business relationships?
A model that I like suggests the steps as follows..
Acknowledgement
Understanding
Acceptance
Respect
Trust
Bond
It took ages to find words that neatly form a pyramid!
Change Management: Style versus Substance?
Style versus Substance: The question of whether success is determined by what you do, or the way that you do it. The new celebrity culture seems less about personal accomplishment and more about self promotion. For some, politics seems the same, with sound-bites and scandals occupying column inches and air-time more than policies.
How does this affect Change Management?
Transactional Change is about tangible incremental improvements; a better working environment; better tools; better training; efficient processes etc. The detail of the business which effects product quality, and which is the substance of what the organisation does.
Transformational Change is about Hearts and Minds, winning the loyalty and commitment of your stakeholders, staff and customers, which is central to the style or culture of an organisation, and how it is perceived.
Without doubt “Change is more effective when people are shown a truth that influences their feelings, than if they are given analysis to shift their thinking.” (Professor John Kotter – Harvard Business School)
The Oscar Nominated “The King’s Speech” is an example of the importance of oratory to leadership, and is unquestionably about the importance of style at a time of change.
I like Robert Dilts model
Click Here for more details
‘I can’t do that here ~ IDENTITIY
I can’t do that here ~ BELIEF
I can’t do that here ~ CAPABILITY
I can’t do that here ~ BEHAVIOUR
I can’t do that here ~ ENVIRONMENT
This suggests that Transformational Change is top-down, beginning with the individual and ending which that individual (or group) changing the environment through changes in their belief, capability and behaviour. It could also be read to suggest that Transactional Change happens when the environment is conducive to change, new behaviours etc., which eventually transform the individual. Few would challenge that a more suitable environment and supportive behaviours make life better.
Beware, the quest for “Hearts and Minds” can be undermined if after a pep-talk about being World Class or Best of Breed your staff return to their desks to use broken computers, difficult software and unreliable printers! Words are important, but not enough.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
Successful change management by taxi?
I’ve recently read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, thanks to a friend who recommended it. It’s a book that has been around of 25 years, but the concepts remain current today.
Ostensibly it is a book about quality, object and function. The anecdote that gives the book its title relates to two motorcyclists. One who takes interest in maintaining their own motorcycle and the other whose pleasure is in riding it, and is happy defer to the expertise of mechanics to do the necessary work. There are, of course, merits in each approach and I would commend the book to anyone interested in a philosophical view.
I was recently challenged about what makes some Consultancies different from others and was minded to think about the difference between change as an object (a motorbike) and as a function (a series of processes).
I think this simplifies..
If you hop into an expensive Mercedes taxi they will take you from A to B very quickly. It may cost you quite a bit, but you will be at your destination. The problem is that there has been no learning and for your next trip you’ll need another taxi. This is change as an object: a destination.
If you take driving lessons in a quality Honda it may take longer to learn how to get from A to B, but you’ll then have the skills to go anywhere you like thereafter. This is change as a function: a series of processes.
The latter is about living the business, being part of the process, not a passenger but an integral part of the change. This is what makes Project & Change businesses different from regular Consultancy firms who fail to integrate Advice + Execution + Learning.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
Simple Project Management
There are lots of courses and qualifications for would-be project managers and it would be impossible to detail all the possible processes and paperwork in 300 words. However there are some key principles…
Strategy can be summarised as 1) Where are we now 2) Where do we want to be 3) How do we get there.
Inevitably Projects are a means of implementation: either defining or delivering the above. What is needed first is a clear understanding and communication of the issues. There is no point in going quickly if it is in the wrong direction!
However there is little to be gained from too much analysis. Visions are great, but they need tasks, time- table and management to become reality. The key to success is having some form of structure.
Simplistically a project should have stages: Beginning (initiation), Middle (implementation) and End (closure) and will have various reports and checks to ensure who does what, how and when. As the saying goes: “What gets measured gets done”.
The most challenging aspects of change is usually due to a lack of resources: time, money, or people and the people element might be due to competence, capacity or commitment. Projects must be about empowering people: it is not sufficient to give someone a new system or process, you much teach them how to use it. However teaching can become preaching (and incur resistance) if you cannot answer the stakeholders question: “What’s in it for me?”.
If there is no motivation or benefit to change them plonking a new system or process onto someone’s desk is going to have disappointing results. The truth is that real success comes from engagement of all the stakeholders, winning “hearts and minds” in order to secure the right talent and temperament for team success.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
Lessons from Triathlon for Business
There are often comparisons between sport and business, especially in goal setting, planning and preparations.
In triathlon you plan your goals according to your strengths: if you are strong on the bike you pick a race that is arduous for the cyclist. Your plan is to find where you are better than the others and capitalise on that. This is the principle of Competitive Advantage.
Having chosen your race, think about the 10-20 weeks prior to the event and plan your training, nutrition and recovery. Whilst your aim is to capitalise on your strengths, your greatest gains may be to attend to the weakest link: No point in being fast on the bike, if you are very, very slow on the swim. In business this is done by SWOT and PEST analysis of factors that will help target your efforts.
Your training plan should have some days that are hard, and some that allow recovery. You should have milestones and tests at various points to check you are making progress. Have category-C races you do only for experience, category-B races which are important tests for which you rest before-hand, and your category-A race (your goal for the year!) This is learning and development.
The programme should be long enough to accommodate short periods of sickness, injury or distractions but short enough to be able to maintain commitment and focus. This is about managing the change journey and avoiding change fatigue.
Realise that success is not about the effort of training, but also about nutrition and recovery. Feed the mind and the body: you would not expect a Formula 1 car to drive endlessly without service or fuel. The same is true of your body and your business. Get the work-life balance right and you will love what you do.
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
Communication and Persuasion
I have been listening, reading and learning a lot about Communications and Persuasion (happy to share the list of materials) and it is clear to me that as well as the AIDA marketing approach (Structuring communications on the basis of Attention, Interest, Desire and Action) it is important that communication follows the key rules of Influence.
1. Consistency – be consistent in your approach, and aligned to their wants and needs
2. Reciprocity – offer something free and they will be grateful, indebted and receptive to you
3. Social Proof – case studies, testimonies, podcasts, references add to credibility
4. Authority – being authoritive, qualified, recognised and respected add to credibility
5. Liking – being like someone else, and being likable, being similar help build rapport
6. Scarcity – rarity, time-limits, availability all drive the buying decision
7. Story Telling – helps people understand and relate to people, situations, and opportunities
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
The AIDA marketing approach
It is interesting how people use the same model in different ways. Take for example the AIDA marketing approach (Structuring communications on the basis of Attention, Interest, Desire and Action).
One approach is that AIDA four headings are the basis of all communicatios: letters, emails and advertisements. Examples
ATTENTION
Would you like your whites whiter than white?
Do you spend hours and pounds trying to get their clothes clean?
Are you bored of diets that don’t work?
INTEREST
New Acme Product Name with its scientific formula will…
Have you heard about the latest celebrity fashion…
Discover the secrets of…
DESIRE
You can have this for…
We are offering….
This is your chance to…
ACTION
Go to your shop…
Subscribe here…
Call us…
Another approach suggests that AIDA four headings are a buying cycle. We need to be made aware of something before we can become interested. Sufficient interest will lead to desire and that to action (buying). Raising awareness is the biggest challenge as information overload increases exponentially. The intial communications effort is all about what’s needed to raise awareness (integrated campaign – burst and drip – push and pull – above and below the line).
Please use the comments box below to let me know, what you think, and how you feel about this?
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
About me and this site
My name is Tim Rogers and over a number of years I have gained my NVQ4 & 5, Certificate and Diploma in Management. I then gained an MBA, and PostGrad qualifications in Law and Compliance. I then became a qualified tutor/mentor for the Chartered Management Institute and taught for both the IFS School of Finance and Jersey Business School.
Over this time I have accumulated a wealth of knowledge, experience and expertise, which I am keen to share.
I had experimented with a website where people can download copies of the presentations and notes which accompany the Chartered Management courses, but feedback from friends suggests that a shorter ‘bite-size’ blog would be more user friendly, especially for those more interested in practical ideas than the academic background.
This is a new venture, I am really interested in what you think! There is no point in my investing my efforts if it isn’t interesting for you. Please offer suggestions or requests for subjects you would be interested in.
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
Over this time I have accumulated a wealth of knowledge, experience and expertise, which I am keen to share.
I had experimented with a website where people can download copies of the presentations and notes which accompany the Chartered Management courses, but feedback from friends suggests that a shorter ‘bite-size’ blog would be more user friendly, especially for those more interested in practical ideas than the academic background.
This is a new venture, I am really interested in what you think! There is no point in my investing my efforts if it isn’t interesting for you. Please offer suggestions or requests for subjects you would be interested in.
Tim Rogers
Mobile - +44 7797 762051
Skype - timhjrogers
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